Shine
by ShaMiru
Summary: "I just had to fall for the most unnerving, complicated, confusing person I've ever known..." ZeXion oneshot, AU-ish


Xion's feet plodded in pointless circles, carrying her around and around her tiny room, her pace growing faster by the second. Unwanted fantasies tiptoed stealthily through her mind, pictures and ideas that had buried themselves deep within her subconscious without her permission. She had hoped that by keeping her feet busy she would distract herself from those ridiculous recurring thoughts. This was obviously not the case. She huffed out another unnecessary sigh, as if it would help to coax out her confusion, before angrily throwing herself backwards onto her bed in defeat.

"Why did it have to be you?" she groaned softly to the empty space around her, her hands quickly finding a small green pillow and pulling it gently to her chest. "I just had to fall for the most unnerving, complicated, confusing person I've ever known..."

Her arms inadvertently clutched the pillow tighter as her eyes fell shut. As usual, painted on her closed lids were recurring images of pale skin, of dark bangs and slender fingers, of coy smirks and meaningful daydreamer's stares, of eyes brimming with an intensely quiet intelligence the likes of which she had never seen in any other...

She couldn't deny that despite the frustration he caused her, he was through and through the most beautiful person she had ever known as well. She would never understand how so many women could overlook him, how his love life could possibly suffer as it did. According to him, potential dates were always put off by his shyness. They saw his silence as a result of cold nature and never thought him worth the trouble. They never looked past it, to see the warm and caring individual underneath. Not like she did. They never saw the way his spirit shined...

"Zexion..." she breathed, the word barely a whisper. She loved the way it sounded as it rolled from her tongue, so straightforward, yet so unique. Just like him, the name was beautiful.

Absently, her fingers wandered to the bedside table and clutched a slip of paper that had been perched on the edge, the overhang dancing daintily to the light waft of the tiny ceiling fan. It was a menu from the cafe that they had visited earlier in the week. He had been so excited to have someone actually volunteer to accompany him to a poetry night. She had just been happy to have an excuse to spend time with him, no matter the setting. She hadn't ever really been into poetry. In all honesty, she had never really been into reading at all. After hearing him babble on and on about the literary works he found himself encompassed in at any given time, she was reluctant to let him know, and when she had finally worked up the courage to reveal what she felt was an inadequacy, his chipper response had been rather unexpected.

"Reading is the best way to become a great writer, and that's exactly what I want to be. Do you ever write, Xion?"

"Um... well I..." she had stammered, feeling a dull nervous thud quicken behind her chest. She had met with him at his house, and he had been gathering his belongings for their short trip. He paused at her hesitation and turned to face her unsure expression. His gaze was expectant and unwavering, but patient. She took a deep breath.

"I haven't... really..." she continued meekly, gazing through the carpeted floor. "I don't really know how... well I mean of course I know how, but... not very well..."

"Would you like to learn?" he chirped, once again taking her by surprise. His usually downtrodden voice, though still rather soft and shy, had an unusual spark behind it. Her eyes snapped back up to meet his, steely and shining. The left corner of his mouth was scrunched up in an adorable half smile. She had seen his face like this only a few times, usually when rambling off about stories that he held particularly close to his heart. Maybe he loved teaching just as much as he loved reading. Xion imagined that her eyes were lighting up as well, at the thought of allowing him to take part in something that seemed to bring him joy. With a soft smile, she had nodded.

"Just let me know when you want to get together again. I'm a quick learner. You can teach me whatever you want."

She was relatively satisfied with his simple response as he politely held the door and beckoned for her to exit. "Will do."

Now, roughly a week and a half later, she was having the same argument with herself for what seemed like the millionth time. She hadn't heard from him yet and it was driving her crazy. On one end she was kicking herself for not actually planning a day to meet up, but on the other she was screaming denials, asking herself why, why it even meant so much to her in the first place, why it was that she couldn't just get him out of her head...

She wistfully glanced at the dark screen of her phone, which had been listlessly plucked from its charger and flipped open. If she were to just dial his number, if she were to actually call him, she wondered what he would say. As if on autopilot, her thumb scrolled quickly through her contacts, stopping at the very last name on the list. She swallowed hard, index finger hovering shakily above the bright green button that would connect her to him.

And then she simply sighed again as she gingerly closed her phone and brought it to her chest, resting it on her security pillow.

"I'm such a coward..." she whined, picking nervously at the cheap silver detail on her cell. And as she closed her eyes for the final time that night, she couldn't fight a sad little smile as she watched the pictures float through her mind, the tender face with the scrunched up little smile, an expression overflowing with the beautifully unique personality that she had, regrettably, grown to love.

Zexion...


End file.
